Lefty
Yank
- 1. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouths closed?
2. Why don't you ever see the headline, "psychic wins lottery"?
3. Why is abbreviated such a long word?
4. Why do doctors call what they do "practice"?
5. Why do you need to click on "start" to stop windows?
6. Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavouring, while washing up liquid contains real lemons?
7. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
8. Why isn't there mouse flavoured cat food?
9. Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitos?
10. Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
11. Why don't they make the whole plane out of the same material as the indestructible black box?
12. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
13. Why are they called apartments when they're all stuck together?
14. Why do they call the airport the "terminal" if flying is so safe?
15. Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
16. Why do they call it 'chili' if it's hot?
17. Why can't you make another word using all the letters in "anagram"?
18. Why can't we tickle ourselves?
19. Why do fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing?
20. If Superman is so smart why does he wear his underpants over his trousers?
21. If swimming is good for your shape, then why do the whales look like the way they do?
22. When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?
23. What was the best thing before sliced bread? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
24. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?
25. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
26. Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
27. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
28. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
29. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?