NCT Posting Policies

It wasn't until fairly recently that I decided to just let stuff go Breezy.

A lesson learned on one of Doc's other forums, as well as here actually (a while ago).
It doesn't have so much to do with posting nasty things toward other members, as it does/did knowing what surprises go on behind the scenes.

I am a very passionate person, no doubt in every way emotionally.
That shows in my posts when I am happy or riled up.

It's not worth getting pissed or upset over what someone says on a board.

I came here because I was invited. The recipes are fun, the foodie pics are awesome, the laughs are great. You have to use your own judgement if you are going to risk the wrath after hitting submit.
That goes for PM, VM or any post made on the board.
I miss a lot of members, others I couldn't care less, now that I've come to feel the way I do.
The End.

buckytom said:

so, when people leave for good because of some stupid arguement, does that mean that all of the supposed friendship that they offered was just bullship? seems to me it makes them kinda shallow.

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Sometimes its just easier being somewhere else. Friendships or not, most people (I assume) aren't here to get worked up. I've seen a few instances where a quick "get back across the line" could have halted escalation. Even when I'm not personally involved, I don't want to be reading personal attacks.

buckytom said:

i hate to mention it, but a lot of this was predicted to happen by the mods and members of another site that should remain unnamed. some of those 36 or so people who have left here left other sites (or were banned) because they just can't seem to get along with others online, or get offended very easily and were quick to start fights.

you either need too grow a thick skin, or a tender heart that is open for both humilty and reconcilliation to be able to get along.
or maybe everyone need some of both.

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That other board moderated content. You'd get nailed if you disagree with them or if you were on the wrong side of a click. I would truly hope that nothing like that happened here.

Kimchee said:

All I ask is that if a thread is closed, or posts removed, PLEASE use it as a teaching moment.
Don't just "disappear" the offense.

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I agree. Otherwise it feels a little Orson Wells-ish and you're left wondering what's going on.

that's it, i'm leaving.

even the peaceful tree huggers are attacking me. what is this world coming to???

vyapti said:

That other board moderated content.

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I'm sooooo glad you mentioned this, vyapti. We are not changing any policies regarding content. There has been a lot of staff discussion about ensuring this. We still have a no debate policy, but members are free to post on pretty much any topic. Thankfully, everyone has been very responsible about using the Back Room for adult or potentially volatile topics.

buckytom said:

i hate to mention it, but a lot of this was predicted to happen by the mods and members of another site that should remain unnamed. some of those 36 or so people who have left here left other sites (or were banned) because they just can't seem to get along with others online, or get offended very easily and were quick to start fights.

you either need too grow a thick skin, or a tender heart that is open for both humilty and reconcilliation to be able to get along.
or maybe everyone need some of both.

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BT, old buddy, you really do have a unique outlook on things. I have a pretty thick skin, as those on FF will attest to, but when it comes to NCT I don't have "the gloves on" when posting here. If someone want to play the village idiot or the know-it-all at the expense of someone else, then I for one am not going to hang around and take abuse from people like that. Some people think that their contributions to the site give them license to get away with abusing others, and frankly, that has been overlooked in the past. If that is allowed to happen, then a clear message has been sent by that action or inaction on behalf of the admins & mods.

There are many other options for places to hang out, and this has nothing to do with the friendships made here. It's about the freedom to just relax and have a good time, without chest thumping or abuse by other members. Are they always going to be there? You bet. But there are always new forums popping up and existing ones that could use some help. Many of us who don't post much here any longer have found some other sites where we have bumped into each other, but as far as I know, nobody has sent out PMs or e-mails for anyone to follow us. That's not the way most of us operate, and Doc has been too good to us for us to do that to him.

Don't look down your nose at us, BT, until you've spent some time in our shoes, and don't think we cherished leaving either.

Joe & all,
This thread is about our changing / adapting to better moderate so that we have a more open & friendly forum. The typed word can be taken the wrong way so easily. I did not take BT's post to be talking down to anyone. We all hate for anyone to leave because of hurt feelings.

When someone posts what they think is a helpful post and someone else takes it as them playing a know it all ...it is a no win situation at that point. Someone will not be happy either because they were moderated or because the other person thinks they should have been moderated and we did not act. It's a very fine line and so easy to upset someone with action or inaction.

Our goal is to make this a fun place to hang out for all. We will strive to do our best to make that the case, but understand we are not perfect. Please bare with us when we miss something, and help us by communicating your point of view to the staff so that we can act or explain why things went down as they did.

Thanks for understanding, and please work with us to help make this a better place for all.

I didn't take BT's post to be pointing fingers at anyone, either. I thought we were all just discussing changes to the site to make it even better.

Joe, you have been vocal about the issues you have with the NCT, which we seriously appreciate and have been part of our discussions. Of course there are other sites. Most of us came from another site. Most of us post at other sites, too, though they may not be other cooking sites.

As far as I know, Doc doesn't make decisions about NCT based upon keeping people from posting on other sites. If someone prefers another site because of the moderation or whatever, then that's where they should be and we wish them well. This is about members leaving or posting less frequently because of uncivil remarks - we don't want members feeling hurt or bullied while here and we are trying to address this. We want people to feel free to express their opinion without having pot shots taken at them.

What I have gathered since I have been at NCT is that this forum is far from perfect...but then so is every other forum out there. Do things happen here that piss me off? Yep...sure do. But, I have also noticed that Doc and the moderators really seem to be trying to make this the best forum possible. Take for instance this very thread...they have taken notice that there is a big problem and they are taking steps to try to fix it in the least intrusive way possible...they have even allowed our input in the matter...how many other forums out there have you seen do that.

It looks to me like the NCT crew seems to be trying to cater to us. Other forums tell you like it is and that's that...there is no discussion...here we are made to feel like we can speak our mind...as long as we don't get ugly. That's one the biggest things that draws me back to this place even when I get mad and feel the need to leave for a while.

I really believe that they are trying to make NCT the best it can be. Are they going to make mistakes? Sure, but so will the rest of us...after all, we're all human and we also all live in glass houses.

I would like to commend the staff here for the difficult job they do...I darn sure wouldn't want to do it.

Wow, Mama!

Thank you so very much!



Lee

Thanks Mama, oh wise one!!!!!

Mama said:

I would like to commend the staff here for the difficult job they do...I darn sure wouldn't want to do it.

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I'll second that.

Thank you very much Mama. I would also like to thank all of the forum members. NCT is about all of you, not about the staff.

I thank you all for the knowledge you have shared with me, which has enabled me to put a better meal on the table.

I thank you for the support that you have given me when I need it.

Oh!And Mama, may I please have some of that cornbread? I screwed up St. Patties dinner and I am a bit hungry.

Of course you can have some cornbread Andy. What happened to your dinner?

I always put beer in the corned beef, I always use the same recipe, I always get rave reviews.

THIS YEAR I hadda go think about it. Use Guinness sez I, It's Irish (I usually use something like Samuel Adams, something a little dark, not a stout) Even found a new recipe (Rule #1 - Never try a new recipe for company). Needless top say it didn't all taste right, company was late, Corned beef was overdone. DW found a way to turn my Kitchen Aid into a splatter painter when making the soda bread. Instead of locking the tilt, she hit the speed all the way up. You guessed it, the head tilted on full speed, each revolution taking a bit more batter and flinging it all over the kitchen. She quickly reached for the control and bumped the open quart of buttermilk by accident. That got everything the mixer missed. That about sums it up. Oops forgot, one and a half couples (Out of 2) backed out.

On the bright side, the one that showed was my stepdaughter, who brought our new 4 month old Granddaughter.

Adillo303 said:

DW found a way to turn my Kitchen Aid into a splatter painter when making the soda bread. INstead of locking the tilt, she hit the speed all the way up. You guessed it, the head tilted on full speed, each revolution taking a bit more batter and flinging it all over the kitchen. She quickly reached for the control and bumped the open quart of buttermilk by accident. That got everything the mixer missed.

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That's happened to the best of us. Give her a hug and get the cleaning supplies out.

Did the hug. Bear & Liam conquer everything below counter level.

Look on the bright side....one day it will be funny.

It was all worth it though, if you got to see your new granddaughter. Got any pics?

Got any pics?

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None from today, We get one nearly every day. I will try to post some tomorrow.

This is a prime example of another thing that I like about this forum. The thread takes on a life of its own and wanders just like conversations do in real life and you don't have to worry about being reprimanded for it. I know that it may bother some folks when people go off on a tangent but I think it makes us all connect better when we aren't limited to what we can talk about in any particular thread.

First I want to agree on the fact that the Mods and Doc do one hell of a job here! Your work and devotion to make NCT a home away from home does not go unnoticed or unappreciated! So thanks guys and gals for all you do for us!! <3

And bestill my heart... but I agree with Bucky on his advice of needing a combination of thick skin and a tender heart when you are choosing to socialize online. Everyone cannot be catered to completely, there will ALWAYS be things we disagree on. Accept it and move on. Life is much too short to dwell on the little things...and if you feel like it is not a little thing, maybe you should take a little time off to reflect, and 9 times out of 10 I bet it will become a little thing in due time.

I have met some AMAZING people on this site and had I allowed small trivial issues get in the way and cause me to leave, I would have missed out....and no one else. If you do not have patience in life for others around you, then YOU are the one to get the grey hairs

Love you guys!!

A couple of things I am proud to say as a former Mod that none of us ever did ( and Doc would NEVER allow):
Installing a hack that would allow us to keep a member from logging on.
Installing a hack that would allow us to read peoples PM's

There is no way for us to read others PM's, and we were always happy to keep it that way. We respected everyone's privacy even though there was a lot of rumors flying around about behind the scenes shenanigans.

As for moderating posts, it is a thin line and someone always goes away mad. As the saying goes, you can't please all of the people all of the time, but you can please some of the people some of the time. We always tried our best to hold discussions prior to taking action so as to get as many different views on the table as possible. However, sometimes there is only one Mod around, so they are forced to take action on their own which is then reviewed by other Mods for input when they log on. We should all take this into consideration when a thread is moderated and have understand for how difficult things can be for a Mod when they are alone on the site.

We never, ever, played favorites and no one ever got special consideration because of any contributions to the site. We always tried to treat everyone with the same dignity and respect we would want for ourselves. Action is only taken when there is proof positive of an infraction, never based on rumors. Even when action is called for, there is always consideration taken into account concerning the persons feelings and how they make take being moderated. Plus there is the fact that we always allow discussion with the person over the action being taken.

These are just some of the things that I have not seen other sites ever do, and a big part of why I call NCT home.

That and all the cool people on here that make the forum so much fun and so informative!

joev, i was going to pm this to you, but then i figured it was ok for the open forum.

i have been in your shoes, so to speak. i left the very first foodie site i frequented because it was controlled by an obvious clique that didn't appreciate much of my humour. i mean, they actually said in so many words that i wasn't welcome anymore, and by whom. the admin was one of them, who even assisted some by giving out me email addy. just a nasty old fart, if you ask me. a few privately said they supported me, then denied it when confronted by the others. before the rooster crowed three times, as it were.

but i left because it became a hassle, not because i was told to, and to this day have felt badly about the "friends" i abandoned. so i understand. i've only been able to keep in touch with one or two of them over the years. again, i do understand why people leave, for the sake of their own sanity. what bugs me is the hipocrisy of all of the lovey dovey friendship crapola that people post, and how quickly they abandon their supposed friends for good when their feathers got ruffled, instead of just taking a break and regrouping their thoughts, putting things in perspective.

i was hoping that by my posts in this thread, some might consider the impermanence of their feelings, and consider that at least part of their discomfort was due to their own take on things. you can only get offended if you allow yourself to be so. also, that people, including themselves, have bad days; some bad weeks or months. in such cases we're bound to run into confrontations and irritating situations.
hopefully, those who have left can see that they have been missed, that water flows quickly under a bridge, and that the friendship that they have offered is still desired by those who are still here.

so sayeth i.

btw, can you get some odor eaters. the smell of yeast is killing me...